The Ore Valley website is provided and maintained by
Ore Advice Support Information Service
46 - 48 Chiltern Drive, Hastings, East Sussex, TN34 3PZ
Tel : 01424 448 141
email: oasis@orevalley.co.uk
A.D.H.D. Support Group News
(Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder)
The support group meets at Oasis (which is in the Surestart building, corner of Chiltern Drive and Quantock Gardens) every Tuesday 9.30 – 11.30am. We have discussion, helpful information, guest speakers and a group of friendly parents / carers who are going through the same situations as you may be experiencing, so they know just how you feel.
We also have information on dyspraxia, Aspburger syndrome, A.D.D., dyslexia and other special needs.
The help line number is 448143 ext 224 at the times stated above, or tel 717 931, there is always someone to help and advise.
A sympathetic letter published lately:-
Dear Onlooker
While on holidays, day trips or outings, please don’t prejudge when you see a child being “naughty”. Some do have tantrums of course, but there are many children who can't help their behaviour.
I know because my child has Special Needs, and 1 know so well the problems - and rewards - this can bring.
Seeing a child running around a store or restaurant, hearing them scream, cry and shout can be disturbing and annoying, but for you it happens infrequently. We parents, on the other hand, can't walk away.
Each parent learns to cope and handle their child's behaviour, but your attitude is something we can have no control over. It's you who can make our outings stressful - or relaxing.
I've known people to stare and say, “She should control that child,” and, "What disgraceful behaviour! He needs a good hiding.”
Yet you have no idea how much you can help just by going about your own business, or even giving a sympathetic smile to the parent. To know that one person understands is wonderful.
As a parent of a child with special needs, I go through many different emotions; denial, fear, even guilt. It’s a long, hard road getting other people to accept your child. Part of that road is also recognising that others may not look on your child as you do.
Parents love and accept their children, and have a great need to protect them. I'm no different.
Children will be children, sweet and polite, cheeky and cheerful, or nasty and naughty. It’s part of growing up and we have all been there at one stage in our lives. Yet some children may never "grow up”.
Next time you are out and you see a child being wilful, think before you judge. It's only by chance that this child is not yours, and they have just as much right to be out and about as you do.
There's an old but very good saying that sums up these occasions: "if you can't say anything nice, say nothing at all" So don't make nasty comments about me and my child. It's very hurtful. What we need is help, understanding and patience.
Yours hopefully,
A loving Mum
